Tag Archives: David Lipscomb Middle School

Breaking My Leg

I have shared my only two athletic achievements worth mentioning: scoring my first soccer goal in Honduras and winning a croquet game in Oxford, England. I know what you’re thinking: the words “achievement” and “croquet” don’t belong in the same sentence. That I would even think to share these two should help to emphasize the […]

Antonio from Bamboola

At the beginning of fifth grade, my first year at David Lipscomb Middle School, I auditioned for the play, Don’t Rock the Boat, and landed a part playing “Antonio from Bamboola.” Antonio is a pirate who commandeers a cruise ship. I wore all black, a fake mustache, and a red sash for a belt. The […]

Tripping over Chains

I follow the bread crumb trail back to the witch’s house where I was afraid and isolated. Back at that place of pain, I discover that the witch is dead. I can see myself splatting on the concrete and laugh. Why? Because it’s funny, and laughter heals wounds.

Puberty is a dark room

I came out of those sex ed classes thinking that line drawings of women’s internal architecture looked like something that would grow on the ocean floor, something that looked like a vegetable but was carniverous.

6th grade was hell

The 6th grade was a bad year for me. I hated middle school in general. Even though I went to a public elementary school, my arrival at a private Christian middle school in the 5th grade signified my miseducation in matters pertaining to sex, girls, profanity, cruelty, ostracism, tribalism, sarcasm, and all the other -isms […]

A use for a time machine

I don’t have many regrets. Even my mistakes have shaped me into the person I am. You could tell your grandmother about the few skeletons in my closet and she’d probably laugh and tell you a few saucy stories about your grandfather. However, if you offered to lend me your time machine for a few […]