Things You Shouldn’t Say to Women

things you shouldn't say to womenI was in the bathroom getting ready for the day. Megan came in. Her face was pale, and her eyes were red.

“I didn’t sleep well,” she said.

“You look like a corpse,” I said.

Judging by the look on her face, she didn’t find my remark funny. I decided to try again.

“And you have dumpster breath.”

She rolled her eyes and went to the sink to brush her teeth.

0 for 2. I can fix this, I thought.

I went in for a hug.

“No! No hugs for you, Mister.”

I usually exercise more tact. After all, I did grow up with a mom and two sisters. My judgment must have been muddy because of the early hour. At anytime after 9am, I would have been able to recite a long list of things you shouldn’t say to women.

Marriage Lessons learned: No edgy humor attempts before 9am; corpse and dumpster references unappreciated any time of day.



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